People always ask me "How were your holidays", to which I reply “good thanks!”, but unless I went travelling, nothing seems significant enough to talk about. But today I started thinking about all the good things I’ve done this summer, including those significant self-growing moments that no one ever talks about but SHOULD BECAUSE THEY ARE DIFFICULT TO GET AROUND TO!
So as I’m going back to Uni tomorrow, which I’m bloody excited about, & a friend reminded me today that it’s officially Autumn, & I can’t believe how both quick & slow this summer has passed, I believe it is important for me to reflect on the GREAT, WONDERFUL TIMES I’ve had & be so, so grateful!
I’ve had a fab summer, & I’m so excited to start my second year of Uni (even though I have to start it at 9am)! Hope you all had a great one too, & feel free to tell me your list of proud & funky moments!
Hi Secret Santa, I’ve heard so much about you!! My day today was terribly boring, so I’ll tell you about my day yesterday! I went to the Camberwell markets & bought a $5 buffalo and bone (which sounds like a cool reggae band) necklace. Then my beautiful friends Rachael and Sam took me to see Catching Fire in Gold Class, which was epic and wonderful. And then we went to dinner on Chapel St at a funky make-your-own-pasta place! Finally, we headed to a rooftop bar called Naked for Satan & had drinks with my friend Henna who turned 19! It was a beautiful, sunshine filled day :) Looking forward to our correspondence xxx
EDIT: hell yeah it was sauced!
Whenever something significant happens in my life - new job, graduation, birthdays - I clean my room. It’s become a ritual for me, a turning of a new page in my life. So I clean out my cupboards and throw away the things that a year ago I could not let go of, and it reminds me that I’ve grown, and it reminds me to not be so afraid of change.
Two days ago as my 19th birthday approached, I found myself lying on the floor again amidst spring clean, as per tradition, completely lost in a memory. That’s the thing about digging through cupboards, you tend to re-live moments you’ve long forgotten, and it sort of throws you off balance for a while.
See, I spend a majority of my time thinking about the future, but not so much time reflecting on the past. But on this day, I found a piece of writing from when I was 13 years old and dreaming about the kind of person I’d be when I graduated high school. And it got me thinking about the kind of person I used to be at 13, and how much has changed & not changed since then. I’ve always feared change, and each birthday usually marked some sort of crisis on my behalf, because I too suffer from the Peter Pan syndrome.
But last night I realised something. I fear change, but I should not fear growth. Growth is necessary to sustain life. Growth is about the choices we make when change inevitably comes knocking down our doors. There is so much that is empowering about growth.
19 is not a special age, nobody writes songs about being 19. But at 19, I feel myself growing in a very real and overwhelming way. It’s difficult for me to explain, but last night I finally started thinking about who I am now, not who I want to become. What kind of person do I want to be now, and how can I get there? I’ve figured it out, & I’m on my way there. I can feel myself growing, and it’s ridiculously inspiring.